Sometimes I reach out my hand.

October 21, 2009 | Filed Under Deployment, Lovers, Photos, Uncategorized 

You're the only one I ever want.

I sleep on the same sheets we’ve slept on for years now. The same sheets we slept on before you left last time. The same sheets I slept on alone, before. And now, alone, again.

They started out as creamy flannel. And now they are silk, softened with use. Pregnant with memories.

Sometimes I slowly reach out my hand even though I know my fingers won’t collide with your body. I do it because I like to remember that they have. And one day they will again.

Sometimes I curl my body into a half moon and wish to once again feel your strong arm glide over and wrap itself around my middle and pull me into you. And if you did, I would lay there nestled in the place that was made only for me.

Our slow quiet breaths sometimes mismatch, sometimes harmonize. But together we would breathe in this abiding love.

I miss feeling you lay next to me. I miss your warm breath on my hair. I miss laying with you, as close as we possibly could be but always wishing it would be closer. I miss falling asleep, our legs and fingers and hearts tangled.

Come home, my love. Our sheets miss you.

Comments

29 Responses to “Sometimes I reach out my hand.”

  1. Sandie on October 21st, 2009 11:24 pm

    I feel your pain, I am so sorry you have to endure, god bless, brilliant girl hang in there

  2. jennifer on October 21st, 2009 11:27 pm

    beautiful post.
    jennifer´s last blog ..I almost forgot My ComLuv Profile

  3. jenny gardner on October 21st, 2009 11:38 pm

    You’re love for your husband is amazing. You two have the kind of relationship most women only dream of. You are very blessed.

  4. Sarah on October 22nd, 2009 4:19 am

    This made me cry. It really is precious having a husband and best friend. He’ll be home before you know it and it will be all the more wonderful.

  5. Tonia on October 22nd, 2009 8:08 am

    I feel the same way about my husband! He’ll be home soon, hang in there Andi, you are very strong and very blessed! I really admire you!

  6. Briar Rose on October 22nd, 2009 8:54 am

    I know how you feel and we are gearing up for another 12 month one soon. It hurts and it sucks.
    Briar Rose´s last blog ..Frustrated but not Angry My ComLuv Profile

  7. jewels on October 22nd, 2009 8:57 am

    That is one of the hardest parts of deployment. Sleeping alone. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it. Hang in there. How much longer will he be gone?
    jewels´s last blog ..Our trip to Twin Falls My ComLuv Profile

  8. Tina on October 22nd, 2009 8:59 am

    Beautiful.
    Tina´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday My ComLuv Profile

  9. Lina Martin on October 22nd, 2009 9:34 am

    that was so beautiful.
    Lina Martin´s last blog ..For Its Hi, Hi, Hey! My ComLuv Profile

  10. Molly @ Star Cottage on October 22nd, 2009 9:38 am

    The Love and Longing you have expressed for Daniel is so Beautiful.

  11. nathalie on October 22nd, 2009 10:04 am

    I have tears in my eyes! You write so beautifully! Daniel will be home soon!

  12. JLS on October 22nd, 2009 10:07 am

    My husband has been home just over 4 months now, but those feelings are still so ripe and vivid. This really stirred up the old emotions. This was beautiful. Thank you for sharing!
    JLS´s last blog ..Live from the hotel in Houston My ComLuv Profile

  13. kristi on October 22nd, 2009 11:16 am

    beautifully written…

  14. Aleah on October 22nd, 2009 11:22 am

    Oh you made tears come to my eyes. That was beautiful!
    Aleah´s last blog ..four years on the 24th My ComLuv Profile

  15. ashlie on October 22nd, 2009 12:25 pm

    Reading that made me miss my husband…and he only left for work four hours ago…I can’t imagine what six months must feel like. Praying for you and Daniel and the kids. Praying the time will pass quickly and you will be in his arms again!
    ashlie´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday…My girl My ComLuv Profile

  16. the mrs. on October 22nd, 2009 12:26 pm

    see you’re profound!

    I hate waking up in the mornings to find his side still perfectly made up…
    the mrs.´s last blog ..Surely I am not the only one My ComLuv Profile

  17. Hilary on October 22nd, 2009 1:47 pm

    Tears..honey that was beautiful!! praying for your heart.

  18. Sarah on October 22nd, 2009 2:54 pm

    Praying for you, and this deployment to go by quickly.

    Hold on to the memories though, it’s what keeps us going until the next time.
    Sarah´s last blog ..Won’t be posting for a while My ComLuv Profile

  19. Lola on October 22nd, 2009 5:13 pm

    Oh man, this sums things up PERFECTLY. Makes me miss the hubs more than usual. :(
    Lola´s last blog ..Day 290: Can I ask you a favor? chance for a prize! :) (EDITED BELOW!) My ComLuv Profile

  20. Lucy on October 22nd, 2009 5:58 pm

    You’re making me cry.

  21. Michelle on October 22nd, 2009 9:46 pm

    I now have a lump in my throat. You write so beautifully and truthfully. Praying the remainder of your time apart passes quickly. Sleep well friend!
    Michelle´s last blog ..Oh my gosh…it’s a blog post! My ComLuv Profile

  22. Ginger on October 23rd, 2009 12:50 am

    This is beautiful…the pictures…the words…your love for your soldier! Brought me to tears!
    Ginger´s last blog ..It’s Official…. My ComLuv Profile

  23. Army Duck on October 23rd, 2009 3:31 am

    Your words always bring me to tears. Beautiful post.

  24. vanessa on October 23rd, 2009 8:10 am

    My heart aches for you. There is nothing to say but I understand.
    vanessa´s last blog ..Time to escape My ComLuv Profile

  25. Lynda on October 23rd, 2009 3:18 pm

    The tears well in my eyes as your descriptive words leave me hurting for you.

  26. orlane ross on October 24th, 2009 9:51 pm

    these posts make me want to cry…. your love for your husband is something wonderful.. i hope to one day experience that kind of love… i’m going through a divorce and i can hand on my heart swear our marriage was not one tenth what yours is… you truly are gorgeous :)

  27. 4 Little Men and Girly Twins on October 25th, 2009 12:13 am

    oh girl that was beautiful!

    i hope we get to meet up again! :)

    britt
    4 Little Men and Girly Twins´s last blog ..bad days My ComLuv Profile

  28. A Crafty Mom on October 27th, 2009 8:26 am

    Beautiful and moving. I hope the time until he returns goes faster than ever. Thinking of you.
    A Crafty Mom´s last blog ..How to Have a Birthday Party on a Budget My ComLuv Profile

  29. Rachael on October 27th, 2009 11:41 pm

    The love that you two have is too beautiful, your post brought tears to my eyes. I reach my own fingers out almost every night, hoping that they will collide with my own love, knowing that they won’t, but hoping still.
    Rachael´s last blog .."Arnie – A Fat Cat" My ComLuv Profile